Four Tips for Healthy Communication

By Carmen Scott

September 18, 2023


Marriages often struggle due to ineffective communication, leading to heartbreaking consequences. Apply these four tips for healthier communication in your relationship.

Stressed couple not communicating

Marriage is often depicted as a blissful journey filled with love and companionship, as it should be. Yet, far too often, the harsh reality reveals a different picture – many marriages are crumbling due to a common culprit: the lack of effective communication.

The State of Marriages

Let's confront the stark numbers found in marriages today, according to recent studies.

Divorce Rates: In the United States alone, the divorce rate hovers around 40-50% (National Center for Health Statistics). This means nearly half of all marriages end in separation, often rooted in communication breakdowns.

Silent Struggles: Divorce statistics may not capture the full extent of the problem. The Institute for Family Studies reports that approximately 30-40% of married couples consider themselves in "low-conflict, unhappy" marriages. This suggests that many couples remain in unsatisfying unions, suffering in silence due to poor communication.

Communication, a Common Culprit: Experts universally agree that a lack of effective communication is one of the primary causes of marital strife. The American Psychological Association highlights that couples who struggle to communicate are more likely to face conflicts, misunderstandings, and, ultimately, relationship dissatisfaction.

An alarming reality, to be sure. However, just like springtime after winter, change and opportunities for growth are available to struggling marriages. Let's move on to the exciting part – four simple solutions that can help partners rekindle their relationship through effective communication.

Solution #1: Prioritize Active Listening

Imagine a marriage where both partners genuinely hear each other out – a place where words are spoken and understood. Active listening is the foundation of healthy communication. To achieve this:

  1. Sit down in a quiet, distraction-free zone.

  2. Give your spouse your full attention.

  3. Ask clarifying questions to ensure you comprehend their perspective.

  4. Practice empathy by acknowledging their feelings.

Making your partner feel heard and valued will allow you to create more profound connections.

Solution #2: Embrace Non-Verbal Communication

Words are just one part of the puzzle; non-verbal cues play a pivotal role in conveying emotions. Smiles, eye contact, and body language can communicate love, affection, and understanding without saying a word.

  1. Make eye contact during conversations.

  2. Use gentle touches to convey affection.

  3. Practice open body language to show you're receptive to your partner's thoughts.

  4. Share your joys and sorrows through your expressions.

Remember, sometimes, the unspoken gestures speak the loudest.

Solution #3: Resolve Conflicts Constructively

Conflicts are inevitable in any relationship. What separates the successful couples from the struggling ones is how they handle disagreements. Instead of letting arguments fester, try these approaches:

  1. Remain calm and composed during heated discussions.

  2. Focus on the issue at hand, not on personal attacks.

  3. Use "I" statements to express your feelings without blaming your partner.

  4. Seek compromise and find win-win solutions.

Constructive conflict resolution strengthens your bond by addressing issues head-on without causing lasting damage.

Solution #4: Regularly Check In and Communicate Expectations

As life constantly evolves, so do the needs of marriage partners. To maintain a thriving marriage, having regular check-ins with your partner and discussing your expectations is crucial.

  1. Set aside time for regular 'relationship check-ins' to discuss concerns and needs.

  2. Share goals and aspirations.

  3. Be open to adapting and compromising as your relationship evolves.

  4. Encourage your partner to express their needs and expectations.

By keeping the lines of communication open and evolving with each other, you'll ensure your marriage remains resilient in the face of life's challenges.

You Can Do This!

In a world where divorce rates are dishearteningly high and countless couples struggle in silence, the importance of effective communication in marriage cannot be overstated. By heeding these suggestions – active listening, non-verbal communication, constructive conflict resolution, and regular check-ins – couples can rewrite their love stories, transforming their relationships into thriving partnerships.

Don't let your marriage become another statistic. Instead, work for it to become a strong partnership of communication, love, and commitment.


Pixie: Helping Couples Communicate

The Pixie app makes communicating with your spouse easy. Share context on everything needed to run your family by organizing and sharing your notes, shopping lists, to-do’s, and documents in one place with your partner. Pixie is the #1 tool for couples to get and stay on the same page.

Download Pixie today for free and level up your communication with your spouse.